Hope Springs Eternal

So Hanna Rosin's article last year called "The End of Men" was just this totally talked about piece. And it poses some interesting theories, which I found myself revisiting when I read this interview with her.
I'd like to start off by saying that I find no use for men. By this I mean I find no use for the stereotypical bro/vague jerk that most men are. The only men I like are men who act like women and certain flavors of gentlemen. Otherwise, they just a waste. One of the problems I have with this article is its broad category of men. Even my categories are too broad for generalization, so this one is too.
At one point in the article, there's discussion of how men are nowhere near as successful as women, but there still people's boyfriends. And I find this troublesome because I don't want a deadbeat, and frankly, I don't think that should be heterosexual women's one option: someone useless. I'd rather be alone. I'd rather be with someone with goals, even if those goals exist outside of a capitalist framework of valuable work.
I also dislike the assumption that men are somehow going to have less cultural or political power just because they're losing other power. I suspect that male-centrism will probably hold on pretty tight, and there will unfortunately be plenty of women who, with false conscienceness, will let them. And you know, just because women are making money doesn't mean they are controlling it. Women's labor has been more prevalent for a much longer time than Rosin is talking about, but it hasn't been paid. Also, thinking of it within a framework of capitalism is misleading anyway, since everyone within a capitalist system is inherently oppressed.

Helping

So when Ashley told me she wanted to see The Help, I groaned. (I can't remember if it was inward or not.) Like, honestly, I would rather not see another movie about benevolent white people who have no sense of larger structural oppression. I don't need to see a movie about that; I'm around white people who already think that and I see it on tv when I am trying to avoid blatant misogyny.
So I was reading this article which is written for young clergywomen about the same book, and I am so glad someone finally laid a particular set of thoughts out for me that I think I've been circling for awhile but have struggled to articulate. The author writes that "the challenge of living amidst privilege can be that Jesus' teachings are incredibly indicting to our own lives, which is part of what makes stories focused on morals so much more inviting, and so much more tempting, than stories focused on ethics." Although I had never thought about it in terms of this book, I have always found all the prattle of most of my fellow Christians to be disappointingly about living to some vague moral stance more based on things like not having sex before marriage or abortions. I can't even think of a fellow Christian peer who has ever once mentioned structural problems or Jesus's work on said subject. (I had a priest who would give sermons on religious tolerance and women's unpaid and unacknowledged labor, and seriously, that guy was mostly awesome. On the other side of the religious spectrum, I can think of a few atheists who had it together when it came to these kinds of problems.)
I've been meditating frequently on how disappointed I am with other Christians, because I suspect the why is important, and I think this might be a very big answer on the why. Because, ultimately, if we aren't against the forces that cause things like poverty and discrimination, that, honestly, what are we in this religion for? Are we here on earth as Christians because we want to improve our communities or because we need something to make us feel superior? If we focus on ending injustices, we are here for the community. If we focus on morals not only are we going to fall short on what God calls us to do, but we're going to end up tending to our egos and not the flock.
As some other notes, I really like the rest of this article for pointing out some of the difficulties with race. I loved this quote that the author brings up "For the dishonesty upon which a society is founded makes every emotion suspect, makes it impossible to know whether what flowed between two people was honest feeling or pity or pragmatism." In this instance, it is used in the context of race, but could easily be applied to other power structures.

Power Down pt. 3

The power went out again yesterday, which is why I didn't update yesterday.  (I was planning to, I swear.)
So much of what I do with my time requires the Internet or at least a computer.  Much of my keeping up with friends happens online, I search for job opportunities online, I do much of my writing on my Word processor, etc.  So I suddenly didn't have a lot to do. 
I went out for a walk.  I went through the park, and at one point, got accosted by a dog.  The owner was nice enough, but the law is they're suppose to be on a leash, but I swear at least half of the dogs I see around there aren't.  I didn't time it as well as I should have, and I came back really sweaty and gross.
I decided to take a quick shower to wash off with some soap.  Just as I was about to get in, my family came home.  I didn't really want them to know I had been out, so I jumped in a little faster than normal.
And when I came out, ten minutes later, they were gone again.
So I sat in one of the rooms with decent sunlight and read another three chapters of a book I am (slowly, agonizingly) working through.  So far, it was eight chapters total for the day, which is way more than I usually read, but, like I said, most of the stuff I needed or wanted to do was unavailable to me. 
Then I tried to lay down and sleep.  I feel in and out of sleep, at one point hearing my sister and Dad talk about my sister going to my Grandma's place.  My Mom was apparently there.  My sister had her final exam the next day and wanted somewhere to study.  She was complaining that she could never get things done with Mom around.  I think the real problem is the tv blasting, but I didn't get up to say anything.  And I feel back asleep. 
I woke up around 11:30, and now the house was completely dark.  No sunlight to use.  So I went downstairs and had a real shower.  I don't know where the hot water went (I didn't use it) but the shower was deathly cold.  I tried to do that thing where you shampoo your hair and then use the water, and it kind of worked, but I had goosebumps all over. 
I got a snack, which was tough to eat in the dark because I was having trouble seeing it, but I managed.  My Dad came down and mentioned to me that my sister was gone.  I actually wasn't sure, given the tenor of the conversation I overheard, what my sister had decided.  As I was eating, my Dad went up to bed. 
After I finished, I tried reading some more.  First I tried to make it work by moonlight, but that wasn't enough.  So then I tried flashlight.  I read another chapter.  Nine chapters is one day is a lot for me, at least right now.  I've got about two hundred more pages before I finish.  I was thinking I would read more, but I felt bad about using up valuable flashlight energy, so I decided to quit. 
As I was walking upstairs, my Dad thought I was a burglar or that one was downstairs, because he went to investigate.  Scared me a little. 
I couldn't sleep.  After my little trip back to school, I was pleasantly surprised by how I adjusted into a more normal sleep cycle.  I was so pleased at myself, because usually I can only keep it going for a day or two before it messes up.  But I managed this one for over a week.  And then all this strange no-power, screwed-up schedule ended it.  I guess I should have known it wasn't going to last. 
I did finally fall into an uneasy sleep before dawn.  I woke up to the sound of my Dad on the phone with someone, then him rustling around in the kitchen.  It meant the power wasn't on, and that he was probably trying to clean out the refrigerator before things went bad. 

Power Down pt. 2

I sat and cut out coupons today.  It's the first time I've done so in years, and it was enlightening. 
For example, when did they start putting in coupons for condoms?  I was tempted to cut that coupon out, but on the off chance one of my parents saw it, I decided not to.
After that, my Dad and I went out for an early dinner.  My Dad had been planning some culinary adventure, but without power, he was unable to start.
We talked about plans for my future education.  I repeated some of the things I've been saying several times, and my Dad reacted to them as if they were totally new.  This is always a little disappointing, because it means he's not listening to me. 
We had dinner.  Our waiter, Erik, was very cute in a clearly-a-Scandinavian way.  I imagined him dressed as a Viking.  I imagined the two of us in one of those Viking romance novels.  (Only, one without so much misogyny.)  He acted shocked when I ordered alcohol and had an id that indicated I was of age. 
As we were eating, my Mom called.  She had gone over to Elizabeth's house to watch her daughter for Elizabeth.  This really annoys me.  Like I said before, Elizabeth is cheap when it comes to babysitting, even though we are family friends and she is forever expecting me to just watch her kid.  So last night when my Mom asked me to babysit for her, I said no.  I said I'd rather watch my Grandma, where I wouldn't be responsible for constantly entertaining her and could get some of my own work done. 
So, apparently this means that my Mom has to pick up the slack.  Elizabeth knows that my Mom is crazy busy and stressed, since that's all she talks about.  Elizabeth takes advantage of us, and my Mom lets her. 
Sorry, I didn't mean to digress.
Anyway, my Mom called, asking my Dad and I to bring her food for her and my sister (who decided to drop by Elizabeth's house too...).  So we got a salad and some crispy chicken. 
I took a moment to check my email at Elizabeth's house, because they actually had power, unlike us. 
The my sister mentioned that she had left the front door unlocked.  Usually, she's so much smarter than that.  Instead of calling us to ask for help, she just left. 
We don't live in a really dangerous neighborhood, but every year people in the neighborhood get robbed.  It's almost on clockwork.  A group of people comes in around two or three at night, opens whatever doors or cars they can, and takes everything out and litters the stuff in front of the house.  And then groups drive by and pick through, taking what they want.

May Forms June Storms

We're having another storm right now.  I'm really afraid that the power is going to go out and that I'll have a replay of what happened a few weeks back. 
The lights have started to do that scary thing where they dim for a second or two before going on again.  And I just wanted to spend the evening reading, writing some poetry and taking a shower.  Never mind. 
My Dad came in earlier to tell me about how it was all stormy and how we might have to make for low ground. 
"It's just a thunderstorm.  There's no tornado.  Right now, there's not even any lightning."
Dad doesn't like it when someone uses science and logic against him.  He's not really good at thinking up arguments on his feet.  That's basically what I do, and if there's anything I love to do, it's argue with people. 

Power Down

The power went out earlier today.  Luckily, it was still mostly light outside.  I had a long list of things I wanted to do, but most of them involved a computer, so I sat down and began doing some reading.  I read two essays, finished the introduction for the book, and then went over a third essay's notes.  (I read that last essay a few months back, so I really don't think it's necessary to re-read it.)  I have a whole list of things now that I want to look up or think about or write about now.  Some of them are actually very exciting.  But I'll save that for later.
Without power, I had to sit in the rooms with large windows and work by them.  My father felt the need to sit in the first room I choose, reading a book, probably a biography.  (All old people, it seems, like biographies.  Which would be fine if they had better taste in people to be interested in.)  Then he would make all sorts of noise that I found very distracting.  So I moved to the kitchen, also with a large enough window I could sit and work by.
But of course that meant my father had to come in and make tons of noise there to.  I moved back to the first room.  He came into the first room, so I'm back in the kitchen.  Then he's back in the kitchen, trying to fix something.
This is one of the many things that irritates my about him.  He's so rude.  You'll clearly be doing something, like talking on the phone, and he always, no matter what, manages to want to distract you, by talking to you.
Finally, I got all the reading I wanted done.  I went upstairs.  I considered calling Dan.  He would probably have a lot to say about us being without power and maybe I could make amends for the insensitive things I said the last time I spoke to him.
Then I looked outside.  We had lost power, presumably, because it was raining.  But the raining stopped about twenty minutes after the power went out.  So I decide to go out.
I always try not to leave a lot of time to talk to my dad.  I quickly say that I am going out for a walk, and then he feels the need to tell me where I should walk.
This is another thing that makes me crazy.  He is always telling me what to do like I'm four.  I'm twenty-two, I'm fine, thanks, go away now.  I can't do anything in his line of sight without him telling me how to do it.  I wish I could say that I'm the only one who does this, but I've heard his officemates complain of the same thing.
People do not like being told what to do.  Generally, it's a bad idea.  If someone asks for advice or your thoughts on the matter, than by all means, be honest, but otherwise, no, no one cares.
His current job is ending soon, which means he will once again have nothing to do but hang around the house and hover over every little thing I do.  God, living here makes me wish I was back at MSU living alone in my room.  It was so pleasant.  I got to be around whoever, and then when I needed time alone, I went to be alone.
When I came back from my walk, the power was thankfully on, and I was able to work on my various projects in relative peace.
But then when I went downstairs to get some crackers, he felt the need to tell me where I could eat them.