Long Walk Kind of Day

Went out to the park today.  I use to take walks, consistently, every day, but I've been so busy lately I haven't had the time. 
I was first annoyed with myself because I forgot my music.  Not that it's necessary, but I love to have a soundtrack when I'm out and about. 
One of the things I've noticed this year is how muted the colors have been.  I'm used to them being super bright, but they just seem to be turning brownish as quickly as possible.  I'm wondering if this is a weather thing or a pollution thing (as Dan mentioned to me last night) or maybe a combination of factors.  Anyway, for the most part, the trees have been disappointing this year in terms of color.  I spotted one tree that was layered with four different colors on it, but most trees were either green or orangy brown.  This saddens me deeply, because there are those couple of trees near the auditorium that are usually gorgeous yellow, like the color of a kid's crayon, and all I get is muddled colors this year. 
Also: the lack of wildlife!  I'm used to seeing so many squirrels, all over each other, and I think I spotted two the whole day.  (One with a very large chunk of apple or bread.)  I saw two packs of ducks and one swan.  And a couple of birds that were white with black spots, which I've never seen before. 
I did a bit of rock climbing, which I'm sure my Mom would yell at me for since I wasn't really in the proper shoes for it.  At the top of one of the first rocks I climbed up, I saw this big nail in the top, which I still haven't figured out what that's for. 
Not much in terms of people watching today either.  Saw a couple of older ladies, one who had this stripped bag and another wearing leggings and a plaid suit jacket, but generally no one that interesting. 
I apologize for my complaining.  It was in no way all bad; in fact, it was very lovely.  I have a strange love for the details of nature.  For example, I totally fell in love with a hollowed out tree stump today.  Later on I saw a tree with this tear shaped hole near its roots that I thought was very beautiful.  And the way the shadows of trees fell caught me by surprise.  And a lot of the rocks I climbed were sparkling in the sun, which I always feel is out of place, since it makes me think of being at a club or Lady Gaga more than it makes me think of nature.  I also saw this tree that had its bottom half of its trunk covered in some kind of vine and then one very ambitious vine going straight up its side, for about a yard.  Or even the way a set of stone stairs can be perfectly covered in leaves, as I saw today, can make me really happen.  I like little details.   
I also went past a jungle gym, and I realized it had been ages since I played on one.  (I can remember babysitting a little boy once and playing there, but that was almost a decade ago.)  There were all sorts of strange devices which I honestly could not figure out what the utility (or lack of utility, as this is a playground and the point is to have fun) was for. 
It's early enough that not all the flowers have died, so I got to enjoy some of those briefly. 
I'm sad Dan wasn't with me to enjoy this.  He's such a nature boy.  He knows a lot more about the stuff out there, of course, and I'm sure he'd be happy to improv a tour for me.  But as I was wandering about, I couldn't help but think of him, and I imagined his laugh.  He'd probably think I was being silly for thinking about him, and then laugh at me.   
I accidentally went home just as a bunch of kids were getting out of school.  They were yelling and carrying on and eating snacks and bragging to each other about their candy stashes this year.  One little girl with glasses kept staring at me. When I gave her a little smile, she walked away from me.  Oh great.  I probably scared her. 

Optometrist

Like most people, I hate going to see doctor's.  But I recently realized what I really hate about going: socializing. 
This seems like a strange thing to say, since I'm relatively social.  But those people I socialize with are friends.  I don't want to talk to my doctor's about stuff.  When they ask "How are you?" I want that to be a cue to assert my overall health, not as a chance to catch up on my family, my career and the drama with that one friend. 
With this in mind I went to see my optometrist.  I sat in the waiting room, reading one of those celebrity magazines that I only look at when there's not something more sophisticated. 
I went in with the assistant, an older woman.  We tested various small things with my eyes.  There's a test where you're suppose to tell if certain circles are jumping out at you while wearing 3-D glasses.  As the years have gone on, I have failed more and more of that test. 
Failing eye tests are nothing new.  When I was thirteen, I had to take an eye test while at school.  I failed the first time, with my glasses on.  So they called me in a second time, and I failed a second time, again, with my glasses on.  I tried to explain to the lady running the test I had really poor eyes, and I think she believed me, but I was really embarrassed by this.  I didn't fail anything at that age. 
We kept going through tests, and, even with my glasses on, it's amazing how little I can see.  I think if I had lived before glasses, I would have been confined. 
The doctor came in and I braced myself.  This doctor really likes to socialize.  It's not that I can't be polite, or that I can't speak back, but this particular doctor likes to talk about politics, and we do not share the same beliefs.  Several years ago, he complained to me about a apparently gay English professor who tried to pick him up.  I have gay friends, and I know there's almost no way this story is true.  LBGT people are scared to pick people up if they don't know their sexuality, especially if they're doing so in an "unsafe" place.  (They're more likely to pick up in a gay club or bar, but there it's expected and assumed you're okay with that.)  I didn't really tell him I disagree, but I don't really want to talk to him about politics.  I only rely on him over my eyes because my Mom insists, but the truth is I'd rather try someone else. 
We had a long discussion about surgery.  We've been considering surgery for my eyes for what seems like ever now.  At least high school, though I think it goes back farther than that.  (I was first told that I could use contacts at ten.  I never have because something about putting shards of plastic in your eye strikes me as gross.  I can't even look at someone who is putting in or taking out their contacts.  It's one of the few things I find unsightly.)
Anyway, the surgery option is always on the table, though it's unclear if I qualify.  I would need to get checked. 
Thankfully, there was none of that.  Instead, he went through the usual tests, checking my eyes with those various glasses.  When he decided on something, we moved on to making sure I didn't have things like glaucoma.
I hate those eye drops that you get.  They always make my eyes sting and they give me a headache.  I don't even try to do anything after an eye exam, because I know it's futile to try. 

Con Virgin

Yesterday, I headed over to a steampunk convention. As some of you know, I'm really interested in subcutltures, and steampunk is one of the newest around. I wanted to do a little amateur anthropology work.
But one of the things that happened was that I ran into my old friend Jack, who I went to high school with. It was through him that I heard about the convention.
Jack's a transman, which means that he's going through a transition right now. He's really cool. He mentioned to me that he wants to go back and see a particular teacher, but since he's begun taking hormones (his voice is very different now), he's a little worried about going back to see that teacher. Not so much because that teacher would hate him, but because it might be a little bit of a shock.
I know if I was in Jack's position, I would feel really awkward about it too. I told him that if he went with a group of friends (we all sat together in the back) or someone gave the teacher warning, it might be fine. I didn't think about it at the time, but I probably should have offered to go with him. Hell, I'd even be polite to my ex-boyfriend to get this to work for Jack.
Anyway, I digressed before I even got started on what I wanted to say. The steampunk convention was really cool. There was a merchants room, and I saw all sorts of cool costumes and props and other nerdy things for sale. Even though I had a fair amount of moolah on me, I always feel like I should be very careful what I buy. (NO impulse purchases.) So I mostly looked. There were some beautiful hats and costumes for sale, and they were very expensive looking. I actually managed to make myself a pretty decent costume just out of the stuff I have in my closet. The only thing I really need to do is to improve this look is maybe add an accessory or two to make it more steampunk-y. I collected tons of fliers and business cards, so I'm hoping that there will be people for me to go to for more stuff, should I decide to buy it. I'm a big believer that it's never too early to start making wishlists for Christmas or your birthday.
The only thing I ended up buying were some clip on magnifying glasses. Basically, one of the most important parts of a steampunk costume is the goggles. But of course these goggles have a very particular design, one that suctions down on each eye, making them less than ideal for those of us who wear glasses full time. So, even though this is one nerdy subculture, you can't help but feel, as someone who wears glasses, that you're being discriminated against once again. But they also make these handy magnifiers you can clip to your glasses to give you a steampunk look and still use your prescription lenses.

I'm also thinking that maybe I should use one of my belts and just buy a few simple add-ons, like a flask or jar or gun holster (with gun, obviously) and that will look way more steampunk than some of the other people I saw there. Steampunk is all in the accessories.
Matt and I headed over to the game room for part of the convention. We played the game Arkham Horror, which is based on the Lovecraft stories. It was this big, impressively complicated game involving investigators trying to stop monsters from destroying the town. The representative showing this game looking like he belonged in a mobster movie and smelled like Burger King fries.
100 posts! Which would probably be more impressive if I hadn't skipped two days of posting, just because there hasn't been much going on or too much going on for me to get to room in the day to post something.