Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Jane Austen's Bad Girls
So I read this really interesting little discussion of Jane Austen's bad girls. What struck me about these articles is that often Jane Austen's bad girls are bad for pursuing sex outside of marriage, which automatically makes them bad (and, you'll notice, are always punished for, both by society and by the men who sleep with them.) And, really, that's something I honestly can't get behind.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Signed Bible
Honestly, Jesus, you dot your i's with hearts? I never did that, not even as a little girl.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Concert on a School Night
Over the weekend Elizabeth fell in love with this band, and since they were playing a show, she wanted to go. She asked a bunch of us to come along, and as I got an invite, I said sure. Jane and Ruth were both going to come, but they didn't show up, so we left without them. I was disappointed, since I like hanging out with both of them. Ruth recently complained to me about Jane's behavior, so I wonder if neither of them showed up because they thought the other one might.
We took a cab, which I about never do. We split it four ways, so the good news is that I only owe Miriam five dollars for the night. (I am miserably bad with change, and didn't have any fives or ones to give her.)
The cab driver was totally awful. He sounded totally confused with Claire told him where to go. He kept repeating it as if he'd never heard of it before, and this makes me nervous. What is it with non-native English speakers repeating everything you say to them? It makes me wonder if they aren't understanding, which would be fine, if they would just ask. There's a guy at the caf that does the same thing. When he first started working there, this would really irk me, but now I mostly ignore it.
It took him a while to find it, and then he sort of just left us in the middle of the street. Um, gee, thanks? Claire told me she thought he was "absolute crap." Amen.
The concert was at this hotel. Actually, I'm honestly not sure if it was a hotel, because the ground level was a very dark bar, with all this wood paneling so it looked super fancy and old, like it would be the sort of place Victorian playboys or Edwardian lords or even flapper girls. I hate the phrase "old-timey" but that's what it reminded me of.
We went up these stairs, where everything was painted a kelly green. At the top was this bizarre room. It was a greenhouse on the roof of the building. The floor had hexagonal white and black tiles, like a bathroom (and again, an old bathroom, like something from the fifties) and Victorian streetlamps in the middle of the room. In one corner, the band was setting up. On the side opposite of where we entered, a very large and fancy bar was being set up.
We were early, which was weird, because Elizabeth thought we were going to be late.
No, instead we spent a lot time sitting around waiting.
The music they played while we waited was all very mod, very forgotten bits of the London 60's. I rather liked it. I used to listen to this music a lot as a young girl, but I haven't for ages.
I feel a little badly about admitting this, but I was not happy with the other sorts of people at this gig. There were a lot of women there, and a lot of them were tall and leggy and clearly could be models. I am not a beautiful person; I felt uglier than normal there. There were also a lot of hipsters there, and I could feel myself roll my eyes internally at them.
Claire asked me where I had gotten my outfit, which was the same one I had worn out a few weeks back when I went out with Erin and Carrie. I told her I had mostly gotten it second hand. The dress, belt and pants were all very cheap, and considering how good I looked, I was pretty pleased with this. The sweater was my Mom's, on loan. And the underwear and panties I had on underneath were mine, along with the socks and tennis shoes. (Aren't you glad to hear that?) "I spent about fifteen dollars on this outfit, overall" I told her, which is pretty damn good. She was impressed.
At this point, a man sidled up to us. He was with a girl. He looked Mediterranean, with the dark eyes and hair and beard. Usually, I would find someone like this attractive, but the skin around his eyes was all red and there was something about him that was off.
For some strange reason Claire felt the need to tell him I was a bit rambunctious. He didn't grin but said "Tell me more." Oh ew. Okay, moving on.
The opening act was this young man from a band who was just playing solo. He was okay. He was playing a very country/blues kind of sound, which normally would be fine, but the crowd clearly wanted to party, and here he was, sort of killing the mood with all these sad songs about girls leaving him. He had one about, I kid you not, driving out on New Orleans during Katrina.
How old is this guy? I thought. He looked my age or slightly older. He was near New Orleans during Katrina?
He was also weirdly egotistically. Like, he had this whole thing where he acted as if he was amazing, and although his playing was quite good, there was nothing about him that was memorable (other than maybe his strange self). He seemed to be playing mostly as a way of pushing himself on the audience.
He talked to much, and Claire didn't like him or his music and she didn't like that he was swearing. At one point, she said something under her breath about the swearing, and it was at the perfect moment, because a hush just happened to fall on the audience right then, and everyone heard her. Claire covered her mouth in embarrassment, and I roared with laughter.
The guy continued playing slow songs. There was something about him that was really awkward, but he also seemed really oblivious about it.
"Did you think you were the best I ever had?" he sang. I found myself thinking that if anyone had him at all, he'd be terribly lucky.
Finally, he realized his slow songs were slowly killing everyone, because midway through one he said "Fuck it. I'm going to play something uptempo." And he did and it was surprisingly, mercifully, better than what had been happening.
Afterwards, he announced he was going to send free zip files with full studio albums from his band to all of us, and curious, I signed up for it. Unfortunately, this meant having to go up and talk to him in person, which honestly, I wasn't really interested in doing. He shook my hand and he seemed okay, though still a little full of himself. He talked to me as if I should immediately think he was a genius, and this annoyed me.
We took a cab, which I about never do. We split it four ways, so the good news is that I only owe Miriam five dollars for the night. (I am miserably bad with change, and didn't have any fives or ones to give her.)
The cab driver was totally awful. He sounded totally confused with Claire told him where to go. He kept repeating it as if he'd never heard of it before, and this makes me nervous. What is it with non-native English speakers repeating everything you say to them? It makes me wonder if they aren't understanding, which would be fine, if they would just ask. There's a guy at the caf that does the same thing. When he first started working there, this would really irk me, but now I mostly ignore it.
It took him a while to find it, and then he sort of just left us in the middle of the street. Um, gee, thanks? Claire told me she thought he was "absolute crap." Amen.
The concert was at this hotel. Actually, I'm honestly not sure if it was a hotel, because the ground level was a very dark bar, with all this wood paneling so it looked super fancy and old, like it would be the sort of place Victorian playboys or Edwardian lords or even flapper girls. I hate the phrase "old-timey" but that's what it reminded me of.
We went up these stairs, where everything was painted a kelly green. At the top was this bizarre room. It was a greenhouse on the roof of the building. The floor had hexagonal white and black tiles, like a bathroom (and again, an old bathroom, like something from the fifties) and Victorian streetlamps in the middle of the room. In one corner, the band was setting up. On the side opposite of where we entered, a very large and fancy bar was being set up.
We were early, which was weird, because Elizabeth thought we were going to be late.
No, instead we spent a lot time sitting around waiting.
The music they played while we waited was all very mod, very forgotten bits of the London 60's. I rather liked it. I used to listen to this music a lot as a young girl, but I haven't for ages.
I feel a little badly about admitting this, but I was not happy with the other sorts of people at this gig. There were a lot of women there, and a lot of them were tall and leggy and clearly could be models. I am not a beautiful person; I felt uglier than normal there. There were also a lot of hipsters there, and I could feel myself roll my eyes internally at them.
Claire asked me where I had gotten my outfit, which was the same one I had worn out a few weeks back when I went out with Erin and Carrie. I told her I had mostly gotten it second hand. The dress, belt and pants were all very cheap, and considering how good I looked, I was pretty pleased with this. The sweater was my Mom's, on loan. And the underwear and panties I had on underneath were mine, along with the socks and tennis shoes. (Aren't you glad to hear that?) "I spent about fifteen dollars on this outfit, overall" I told her, which is pretty damn good. She was impressed.
At this point, a man sidled up to us. He was with a girl. He looked Mediterranean, with the dark eyes and hair and beard. Usually, I would find someone like this attractive, but the skin around his eyes was all red and there was something about him that was off.
For some strange reason Claire felt the need to tell him I was a bit rambunctious. He didn't grin but said "Tell me more." Oh ew. Okay, moving on.
The opening act was this young man from a band who was just playing solo. He was okay. He was playing a very country/blues kind of sound, which normally would be fine, but the crowd clearly wanted to party, and here he was, sort of killing the mood with all these sad songs about girls leaving him. He had one about, I kid you not, driving out on New Orleans during Katrina.
How old is this guy? I thought. He looked my age or slightly older. He was near New Orleans during Katrina?
He was also weirdly egotistically. Like, he had this whole thing where he acted as if he was amazing, and although his playing was quite good, there was nothing about him that was memorable (other than maybe his strange self). He seemed to be playing mostly as a way of pushing himself on the audience.
He talked to much, and Claire didn't like him or his music and she didn't like that he was swearing. At one point, she said something under her breath about the swearing, and it was at the perfect moment, because a hush just happened to fall on the audience right then, and everyone heard her. Claire covered her mouth in embarrassment, and I roared with laughter.
The guy continued playing slow songs. There was something about him that was really awkward, but he also seemed really oblivious about it.
"Did you think you were the best I ever had?" he sang. I found myself thinking that if anyone had him at all, he'd be terribly lucky.
Finally, he realized his slow songs were slowly killing everyone, because midway through one he said "Fuck it. I'm going to play something uptempo." And he did and it was surprisingly, mercifully, better than what had been happening.
Afterwards, he announced he was going to send free zip files with full studio albums from his band to all of us, and curious, I signed up for it. Unfortunately, this meant having to go up and talk to him in person, which honestly, I wasn't really interested in doing. He shook my hand and he seemed okay, though still a little full of himself. He talked to me as if I should immediately think he was a genius, and this annoyed me.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Breakfast this Morning
Preadad babbled at me again this morning. "What?" I asked.
"I said that I really needs these two minutes," she said, clear exasperated with me.
Oh okay. Mostly no one else misunderstands her too, so I don't feel too bad about it. I had gotten the two minutes thing but not the importance of two minutes.
When I got in line for breakfast behind Preadad, I noticed Ruth was in front of her. Oh good, I thought. I can have breakfast with her. I watched as Preadad reached over Ruth's plate to grab things. Something told me Ruth was going to mention how irritating that was.
Which Ruth totally did.
We chatted about librarians with egos and nasty men and bad roommates. I still wasn't really up, but so far a nice breakfast. (Preadad booked it out of there fast; what she possibly had time to eat I don't know.)
Lavvy came up to me just as I was finishing up. I told her not to bother moving. As we were going back to our rooms, I noted that she had a sugar packet stuck to her shirt. I almost said something to her, but there were two other girls with us, and I didn't want to embarrass her.
"I said that I really needs these two minutes," she said, clear exasperated with me.
Oh okay. Mostly no one else misunderstands her too, so I don't feel too bad about it. I had gotten the two minutes thing but not the importance of two minutes.
When I got in line for breakfast behind Preadad, I noticed Ruth was in front of her. Oh good, I thought. I can have breakfast with her. I watched as Preadad reached over Ruth's plate to grab things. Something told me Ruth was going to mention how irritating that was.
Which Ruth totally did.
We chatted about librarians with egos and nasty men and bad roommates. I still wasn't really up, but so far a nice breakfast. (Preadad booked it out of there fast; what she possibly had time to eat I don't know.)
Lavvy came up to me just as I was finishing up. I told her not to bother moving. As we were going back to our rooms, I noted that she had a sugar packet stuck to her shirt. I almost said something to her, but there were two other girls with us, and I didn't want to embarrass her.
Friday, January 28, 2011
The Night of Ring Day
Dinner tonight was quiet. Ruth is gone and Elizabeth didn't show up, so it was sort of a smaller group than usual. Jenny talked a bit about her first hangover and Claire and her struck up a conversation talking about Scottish slang.
Preadad came over to sit with us again tonight. I really don't like her, and I wish, honestly, she wouldn't talk to me, because I hate making the effort to be nice to her. It sounds terrible, but I sort of like it when I and someone else decide we don't like each other, and since there aren't many circumstances in which we have to talk to one other, we simply avoid each other, and thus avoid confrontation. I especially like this because it allows me to avoid trying to be better natured than I truly am.
It was all big news that we were going out tonight to celebrate Rachel getting a new job. I found myself wondering how much I should put into my appearance. I really don't want to make an effort tonight, and honestly if this wasn't for Rachel, I wouldn't go out at all and just stay in and watch a movie.
Nina asked me to buy toilet paper, and since I was running low on shampoo, in between dinner and going out I went to get some. Pharmacies around here are shabby, and this one was no different, with the computer freezing up as I tried to check out.
I finally got home, and put on the lightest bit of makeup, and then went downstairs. On the way down, I ran into Mimi. She gave me this strange speech about when one should press the button on the elevator. "Wait five seconds before you press it."
"Okay," I said. I continued saying that, even though she didn't really wait for me to confirm I was listening, just talked about how you have to wait, counting it out for me in demonstration. It's not as if it matters: the door closes when it is ready to; pressing the button at one second or another doesn't make a difference; you still end up at the same place at the same time. But everyone sort of humors Mimi because she seems to be at least a little bit mad.
Downstairs we had a ring day celebration. This is some strange game Elizabeth made up to celebrate achievements of various kinds. The last time was for Rebecca, and for whatever reason I missed it. (Had I gone out that even with Mikey? I can't recall.) Anyway, this was my first ring day, so I didn't know exactly what to expect, though Elizabeth had explained it to me once.
Basically, Elizabeth brought this giant hula hoop, covered with ribbons, and she told Rachel she had to walk through it. Several people took pictures as Rachel crawled through in in slow motion. (She even said the word "slow motion" as slowly as possible.)
Then Elizabeth gave Rachel this ring, which I was really surprised to say looked really nice. It was sort of knot set with green stones. Then everyone had to twist the ring around Rachel's ring going towards the pinkie finger. "Don't go the other way or she'll be a nun," Elizabeth insisted. I honestly don't know if that's true or not, but I really don't know much about how nuns are made other than to say they are married to God and whatnot.
There were other people sort of milling about and you could tell they thought we were barking mad, and they were sort of laughing at our escapades. I hate to say it, but adults are always making up little games, even if they don't talk about it. (Especially if they don't talk about.)
Lola was there, and I was sort of surprised to see her. I don't remember her being as pretty as she was today. Maybe I am appreciating her now that I don't see her on a regular basis and she doesn't have a chance to annoy me twice a day.
We went out to the bar then. When we got there, we had a bit of trouble. The woman wouldn't let us sit down at a table. The girls prefer this bar because they let us sit down. I realized if we were here an hour later it probably wouldn't be a problem.
Amanda made the comment that "the customer is always right," and that service jobs are all about giving people what they want. She's right, of course, but it is one of the things that I am not good at, even when I remind myself. I am just naturally not inclined towards other people.
I think what was sort of irritating was that Rachel had actually made reservations before hand, and they were giving her trouble now.
After a bit of trouble, they let us sit down. I tried to be super gracious. I'd been to this bar before and I had never seen the young woman in question, which makes me wonder if she is new.
We had the same waiter we had a couple of weeks ago when I went out with the girls. A bunch of them ordered margaritas. I noticed a listening for a spiked Arnold Palmer, so I ordered that.
It was horrible. Like, really rank. I actually have not been impressed by this place in terms of drinks. Long Island Ice Teas and Captain and Cokes are also really bad at this place. And I'm not a fan of margaritas.
Meanwhile, I chatted with the girls. Lola sat on the other side of the table, so I didn't really mind her at all tonight. I sat with Jenny and Claire. Jenny and I complained a lot about various mutual enemies. We sort of filled Claire in on how Jenny has become Mimi's friend, though Jenny really hates her. Everyone enjoyed my story of the latest run-in with Mimi on the elevator.
Jenny also knew somethings about Mimi I didn't. According to Jenny, Mimi has four sisters, and all of them are married and normal. Mimi was apparently showing Jenny a family album and she had all these pictures of her nephews and nieces, and none of them were smiling in any of them.
"That's because they were with Mimi," Jenny explained.
Preadad came over to sit with us again tonight. I really don't like her, and I wish, honestly, she wouldn't talk to me, because I hate making the effort to be nice to her. It sounds terrible, but I sort of like it when I and someone else decide we don't like each other, and since there aren't many circumstances in which we have to talk to one other, we simply avoid each other, and thus avoid confrontation. I especially like this because it allows me to avoid trying to be better natured than I truly am.
It was all big news that we were going out tonight to celebrate Rachel getting a new job. I found myself wondering how much I should put into my appearance. I really don't want to make an effort tonight, and honestly if this wasn't for Rachel, I wouldn't go out at all and just stay in and watch a movie.
Nina asked me to buy toilet paper, and since I was running low on shampoo, in between dinner and going out I went to get some. Pharmacies around here are shabby, and this one was no different, with the computer freezing up as I tried to check out.
I finally got home, and put on the lightest bit of makeup, and then went downstairs. On the way down, I ran into Mimi. She gave me this strange speech about when one should press the button on the elevator. "Wait five seconds before you press it."
"Okay," I said. I continued saying that, even though she didn't really wait for me to confirm I was listening, just talked about how you have to wait, counting it out for me in demonstration. It's not as if it matters: the door closes when it is ready to; pressing the button at one second or another doesn't make a difference; you still end up at the same place at the same time. But everyone sort of humors Mimi because she seems to be at least a little bit mad.
Downstairs we had a ring day celebration. This is some strange game Elizabeth made up to celebrate achievements of various kinds. The last time was for Rebecca, and for whatever reason I missed it. (Had I gone out that even with Mikey? I can't recall.) Anyway, this was my first ring day, so I didn't know exactly what to expect, though Elizabeth had explained it to me once.
Basically, Elizabeth brought this giant hula hoop, covered with ribbons, and she told Rachel she had to walk through it. Several people took pictures as Rachel crawled through in in slow motion. (She even said the word "slow motion" as slowly as possible.)
Then Elizabeth gave Rachel this ring, which I was really surprised to say looked really nice. It was sort of knot set with green stones. Then everyone had to twist the ring around Rachel's ring going towards the pinkie finger. "Don't go the other way or she'll be a nun," Elizabeth insisted. I honestly don't know if that's true or not, but I really don't know much about how nuns are made other than to say they are married to God and whatnot.
There were other people sort of milling about and you could tell they thought we were barking mad, and they were sort of laughing at our escapades. I hate to say it, but adults are always making up little games, even if they don't talk about it. (Especially if they don't talk about.)
Lola was there, and I was sort of surprised to see her. I don't remember her being as pretty as she was today. Maybe I am appreciating her now that I don't see her on a regular basis and she doesn't have a chance to annoy me twice a day.
We went out to the bar then. When we got there, we had a bit of trouble. The woman wouldn't let us sit down at a table. The girls prefer this bar because they let us sit down. I realized if we were here an hour later it probably wouldn't be a problem.
Amanda made the comment that "the customer is always right," and that service jobs are all about giving people what they want. She's right, of course, but it is one of the things that I am not good at, even when I remind myself. I am just naturally not inclined towards other people.
I think what was sort of irritating was that Rachel had actually made reservations before hand, and they were giving her trouble now.
After a bit of trouble, they let us sit down. I tried to be super gracious. I'd been to this bar before and I had never seen the young woman in question, which makes me wonder if she is new.
We had the same waiter we had a couple of weeks ago when I went out with the girls. A bunch of them ordered margaritas. I noticed a listening for a spiked Arnold Palmer, so I ordered that.
It was horrible. Like, really rank. I actually have not been impressed by this place in terms of drinks. Long Island Ice Teas and Captain and Cokes are also really bad at this place. And I'm not a fan of margaritas.
Meanwhile, I chatted with the girls. Lola sat on the other side of the table, so I didn't really mind her at all tonight. I sat with Jenny and Claire. Jenny and I complained a lot about various mutual enemies. We sort of filled Claire in on how Jenny has become Mimi's friend, though Jenny really hates her. Everyone enjoyed my story of the latest run-in with Mimi on the elevator.
Jenny also knew somethings about Mimi I didn't. According to Jenny, Mimi has four sisters, and all of them are married and normal. Mimi was apparently showing Jenny a family album and she had all these pictures of her nephews and nieces, and none of them were smiling in any of them.
"That's because they were with Mimi," Jenny explained.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
I Was a Teenage Feminist
I love this little video clip. I love the cute bits of her younger self, and I love that she wants to find her feminism.
You go girl! Hope you got there. :)
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Keep Your Head Up
My friend Sam showed me this video. The song is fun, though it seriously sounds like so many other songs I will probably get it confused with other ones.
What I really like in this video is all the cute clothes the girls are wearing. I would totally wear these outfits. I especially like the girl with the orange highlights and the pink mini coat that the girl with pigtails is wearing.
And Dwight! Gotta love Dwight. He would totally show up in a music video.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Working on the Resolution
Back at work for the first time since the holidays. It was an okay day. It was quiet in the office, but I got swamped with work, most of it that I'm going to have to do tomorrow. Mostly it was the same paperwork I've gotten used to, though there was some talk about training me in new stuff I've never done before and then maybe I helped out with a small project.
After work I had dinner with Elizabeth, Jenny and Rebecca. When I sat down with Elizabeth, I immediately noticed Mimi wasn't sitting with her usual group of friends.
"Has something happened?" I asked. I already knew the answer.
"Mimi had a fight with Isabel."
Mimi having a fight is nothing new; she fights all the time, but usually with Maria. Isabel can be a really difficult person to get along with too, but I've never seen the two of them go at it.
"What was the fight over?"
"I don't know."
"Probably the tv."
Elizabeth let out an exasperated sigh. "We're suppose to be adults, for god's sake."
"I mean, maybe not, it's just that every fight I've witnessed has been over the tv." And even though I've never see Isabel fight with someone over the tv, I've watched her be heavy handed with others. Mimi is not the kind to take well to that kind of thing.
Isabel has this annoying tendency to come in and change the channel to the news, even if you're clearly sitting there. Her rational is that she has to watch the news, which would be fine, but she always falls asleep anyway. I wish she'd just get a tv in her own room so she could sleep there and not annoy me.
We chatted a little about the fighting. Elizabeth had some theories on it. She thought that maybe the younger girls were just better behaved because they had a common enemy. Honestly, I think it's just a better attitude. Mary Kay gets on with people, but that's because she's nice. Mimi and Isabel are notoriously mean or at the least difficult, and mean people don't usually nice-up when someone's mean to them. They just get worse.
Faith and Jessica came around, and we all sat with each other. We chatted about learning how to drive. Elizabeth told us about being out in the snow. We had our usual good dinner. Mimi kind of wanted to sit with us, but I'm not sure about letting her round. I've already watched her be so mean to people, and she sort of has this weird need to get Jenny's attention all the time.
After dinner, I sat down to too some reading, and I ended up having a heart to heart with Jon. Jon and I have been friends for years, but we're not really close. But tonight we sort of bonded over some stuff. I was really surprised at his candor.
I really appreciate it when people tell me something true, something they are struggling to say. As much as I hate to admit it, I always thought Jon was telling me the truth, it just was an ugly one that made me dislike a lot about him. But tonight he showed me there was a sad, disappointed person inside, and it made me care for him a great deal more.
I didn't formally set a New Year's resolution, but I was thinking the other day about how I need to be more forgiving and less judgemental. Maybe this was a good way to start.
After work I had dinner with Elizabeth, Jenny and Rebecca. When I sat down with Elizabeth, I immediately noticed Mimi wasn't sitting with her usual group of friends.
"Has something happened?" I asked. I already knew the answer.
"Mimi had a fight with Isabel."
Mimi having a fight is nothing new; she fights all the time, but usually with Maria. Isabel can be a really difficult person to get along with too, but I've never seen the two of them go at it.
"What was the fight over?"
"I don't know."
"Probably the tv."
Elizabeth let out an exasperated sigh. "We're suppose to be adults, for god's sake."
"I mean, maybe not, it's just that every fight I've witnessed has been over the tv." And even though I've never see Isabel fight with someone over the tv, I've watched her be heavy handed with others. Mimi is not the kind to take well to that kind of thing.
Isabel has this annoying tendency to come in and change the channel to the news, even if you're clearly sitting there. Her rational is that she has to watch the news, which would be fine, but she always falls asleep anyway. I wish she'd just get a tv in her own room so she could sleep there and not annoy me.
We chatted a little about the fighting. Elizabeth had some theories on it. She thought that maybe the younger girls were just better behaved because they had a common enemy. Honestly, I think it's just a better attitude. Mary Kay gets on with people, but that's because she's nice. Mimi and Isabel are notoriously mean or at the least difficult, and mean people don't usually nice-up when someone's mean to them. They just get worse.
Faith and Jessica came around, and we all sat with each other. We chatted about learning how to drive. Elizabeth told us about being out in the snow. We had our usual good dinner. Mimi kind of wanted to sit with us, but I'm not sure about letting her round. I've already watched her be so mean to people, and she sort of has this weird need to get Jenny's attention all the time.
After dinner, I sat down to too some reading, and I ended up having a heart to heart with Jon. Jon and I have been friends for years, but we're not really close. But tonight we sort of bonded over some stuff. I was really surprised at his candor.
I really appreciate it when people tell me something true, something they are struggling to say. As much as I hate to admit it, I always thought Jon was telling me the truth, it just was an ugly one that made me dislike a lot about him. But tonight he showed me there was a sad, disappointed person inside, and it made me care for him a great deal more.
I didn't formally set a New Year's resolution, but I was thinking the other day about how I need to be more forgiving and less judgemental. Maybe this was a good way to start.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Church was okay. The choir had a lot of unity among their sections, but as a whole, not so much. There were parts where they were just off. I tried to control my face so people wouldn't show my disapproval.
One of the reasons I was excited to go to midnight mass was because this would mean there wouldn't be any children. Which of course means that they only people who did bring a toddler sat right behind my Mom and me. After the choir finished its first song, the little girl screamed "YAY!" and it echoed. I was getting a headache. Great.
The little girl continued to scream during the service. When the priest first ascended to the altar, she started screaming about Santa. I considered turning around and telling her that Santa doesn't come to little girls who scream in church, because I could have sworn that my Mom told me that when I was a child.
I guess what really annoys me about the screaming little girl is that you'd have to be stupid to drag your two-year-old out to a mass that starts at midnight. And the church has a cry-room, and tonight it was totally empty.
The priest gave a sermon on the historical background of Jesus's birth, talking about the Roman Empire. I found myself thinking about Machiavelli's Monarchy, which is this eccentric argument about how monarchy is God's form of government because Jesus was born at the time of Augustus. (Oh I know: where to even begin taking an argument like that apart. I suspect this is why I've never come across anyone who's tried. It's such a terrible argument no one even needs to refute it.)
People think history is boring, and no one in church was really that interested in Luke and titles, even though I thought it was interesting, but I took Roman history from a secular perspective, not a Christian one.
Right as we were going through the ritual for the Eucharist, the little girl behind me finally stopped screaming, but now she was sobbing. That it took that long was shocking to me. I didn't turn around to shake hands with these people because I was afraid my face would be all screwed up in disgust.
My Mom felt the need to give me a commentary of what was going on in the choir. There's a new music director, and I hate to admit I find him very attractive in a vaguely Alan Cumming sort of way. He was using an Ipad to play music off of, which I've never seen before, but I guess that's an application I had never considered for a device like that.
After mass I was able to avoid talking to some neighbors. My family likes them but I honestly don't like most of them, and like I said before, I'm trying to avoid people I went to school with once because of the judginess of everyone. I'm doing okay, and I'm grateful, but to some degree, people will always find fault with you.
We went home, and I was disappointed to realize church hadn't cheered me up the way it usually does. I suspect that this is one of those things were I like church with friends or alone, and I found myself missing Paul again.
At home, my sister and Dad were making slushies with some new device my sister got for Christmas. (She decided to open a gift early.) She offered to make me one, but I honestly didn't feel like one. I spiked some egg nog with spiced rum and that was okay.
My Dad went to bed and my Mom and sister went to watch a movie. I saw that Invader Zim and Doctor Who were both on, so I went into another room to watch those. And then ended up watching more of my hottness on Criminal Minds. Which was fine with me. I watched tv and did some creative nonfiction writing.
Finally, around 3:30 in the morning, I went to bed.
My Mom woke me up to open presents by texting me. (I don't know why but my family has taken to texting me even when I am in the same building.) And then Robert texted me "Merry Christmas!"
I went downstairs to open presents because my sister was going to see her boyfriend later in the day.
We opened presents. I got some books, movies and music. My sister liked the t-shirt I bought for her. I'm still disappointed in myself for not getting her a purse like I wanted, but maybe that was for the best, since she got two purses for Christmas as was. My sister ironically enough also got me a t-shirt, with a big cross on it.
I went back to bed. I didn't really sleep much because Jennifer, Ashley and Philip all texted me Merry Christmas messages. I was surprised to hear from Philip, but happily so. I've really missed him lately too.
I gave up on getting more sleep and got up. I went downstairs and started working some more on my writing. My Mom came in and turned on the tv to a Christmas movie of some kind I had never heard of before.
I thought about going with my Mom to the hospital to see my Grandma. My Mom is afraid, in addition to all are other fears about her, is afraid that maybe she's lost her Medicare. I really hope not, but this just seems like one more problem to deal with and we already have so many problems concerning her as it is.
I offered to go, but my Mom told me to stay home because she wanted to stay all day and didn't want to come home early because of me. So I guessed I was staying home.
I took some notes on some ideas for romance novels.
I tried to get some lunch. My sister was doing some last minute baking, and it's kind of hard to get to stuff in the kitchen when someone's working on a food project. When she was finally done, I tried to find something to eat. I was going to make nachos (the only thing I've been really wanting to eat lately) but the cheese was gone and my chips were all broken up into small pieces anyway. I decided not to bother.
Which is how I ended up spending my time in front of the tv.
One of the reasons I was excited to go to midnight mass was because this would mean there wouldn't be any children. Which of course means that they only people who did bring a toddler sat right behind my Mom and me. After the choir finished its first song, the little girl screamed "YAY!" and it echoed. I was getting a headache. Great.
The little girl continued to scream during the service. When the priest first ascended to the altar, she started screaming about Santa. I considered turning around and telling her that Santa doesn't come to little girls who scream in church, because I could have sworn that my Mom told me that when I was a child.
I guess what really annoys me about the screaming little girl is that you'd have to be stupid to drag your two-year-old out to a mass that starts at midnight. And the church has a cry-room, and tonight it was totally empty.
The priest gave a sermon on the historical background of Jesus's birth, talking about the Roman Empire. I found myself thinking about Machiavelli's Monarchy, which is this eccentric argument about how monarchy is God's form of government because Jesus was born at the time of Augustus. (Oh I know: where to even begin taking an argument like that apart. I suspect this is why I've never come across anyone who's tried. It's such a terrible argument no one even needs to refute it.)
People think history is boring, and no one in church was really that interested in Luke and titles, even though I thought it was interesting, but I took Roman history from a secular perspective, not a Christian one.
Right as we were going through the ritual for the Eucharist, the little girl behind me finally stopped screaming, but now she was sobbing. That it took that long was shocking to me. I didn't turn around to shake hands with these people because I was afraid my face would be all screwed up in disgust.
My Mom felt the need to give me a commentary of what was going on in the choir. There's a new music director, and I hate to admit I find him very attractive in a vaguely Alan Cumming sort of way. He was using an Ipad to play music off of, which I've never seen before, but I guess that's an application I had never considered for a device like that.
After mass I was able to avoid talking to some neighbors. My family likes them but I honestly don't like most of them, and like I said before, I'm trying to avoid people I went to school with once because of the judginess of everyone. I'm doing okay, and I'm grateful, but to some degree, people will always find fault with you.
We went home, and I was disappointed to realize church hadn't cheered me up the way it usually does. I suspect that this is one of those things were I like church with friends or alone, and I found myself missing Paul again.
At home, my sister and Dad were making slushies with some new device my sister got for Christmas. (She decided to open a gift early.) She offered to make me one, but I honestly didn't feel like one. I spiked some egg nog with spiced rum and that was okay.
Finally, around 3:30 in the morning, I went to bed.
My Mom woke me up to open presents by texting me. (I don't know why but my family has taken to texting me even when I am in the same building.) And then Robert texted me "Merry Christmas!"
I went downstairs to open presents because my sister was going to see her boyfriend later in the day.
We opened presents. I got some books, movies and music. My sister liked the t-shirt I bought for her. I'm still disappointed in myself for not getting her a purse like I wanted, but maybe that was for the best, since she got two purses for Christmas as was. My sister ironically enough also got me a t-shirt, with a big cross on it.
I went back to bed. I didn't really sleep much because Jennifer, Ashley and Philip all texted me Merry Christmas messages. I was surprised to hear from Philip, but happily so. I've really missed him lately too.
I gave up on getting more sleep and got up. I went downstairs and started working some more on my writing. My Mom came in and turned on the tv to a Christmas movie of some kind I had never heard of before.
I thought about going with my Mom to the hospital to see my Grandma. My Mom is afraid, in addition to all are other fears about her, is afraid that maybe she's lost her Medicare. I really hope not, but this just seems like one more problem to deal with and we already have so many problems concerning her as it is.
I offered to go, but my Mom told me to stay home because she wanted to stay all day and didn't want to come home early because of me. So I guessed I was staying home.
I took some notes on some ideas for romance novels.
I tried to get some lunch. My sister was doing some last minute baking, and it's kind of hard to get to stuff in the kitchen when someone's working on a food project. When she was finally done, I tried to find something to eat. I was going to make nachos (the only thing I've been really wanting to eat lately) but the cheese was gone and my chips were all broken up into small pieces anyway. I decided not to bother.
Which is how I ended up spending my time in front of the tv.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Now That's Talent
At dinner tonight I was sitting with Bethany and Olivia. Crazy woman from a few posts ago was sitting at a table nearby. At one point she burped (exploded, really) loudly and all three of us whipped our heads around, not realizing it was her.
"Now that's a talent," I said. Bethany and Olivia both smiled. The talent show was tonight, and Bethany was performing.
I asked Elena if she wanted to go to the talent show we were having, and she said no, because she had to study. Then she sat down and started watching a tv show online. Okay, I thought. Elena isn't very social. She'll sit with me in the caf if I'm alone, but if I'm with anyone else, she'll sit alone.
But I went anyway, sitting down next to Lavina. We chatted a bit, and then Jenny came in to sit behind me. She was exicted for this talent show because she thinks everyone here is talentless. Considering who I knew was performing, I had to agree, but I was here mostly for the treats and the laugh.
It was worse than I thought. First, they had Portia come up and read a poem. Portia strikes me as really stupid, but I had no idea she was a writer. The announcer said she had even been published and then I thought "maybe she really is good."
But she wasn't. Poetry is so hard, I know, but her poem was about the language of love, and about the soul, and at one point the "pencil of justice" was involved. When she said this it was really funny, just because she said it like a mother scolds a child. Jenny started cracking up behind me. I was trying really hard to ignore her because if I started giggling I might not stop.
Then a solo by Mary Kay. She has a low voice, which might have been fine, but she was totally off-key the entire time. She was good enough to dance through her song though.
Then a couple of artists showed off their paintings. The announcer kept saying they were watercolor, but I'm pretty sure watercolors don't really manage black (I know because I tried during my Gothy art days). I'm almost certain they were oil paintings. Also, someone took responsibility for this creepy painting of a man that eyes follow me every time I'm in the room. So I guess now I know who to blame.
Then Bethany's dance. It was by far the best performance of the night, but I didn't think it was that good. As terrible as this is to say, I've seen such better dancing, though there were parts where she was really fluid or did something bendable and impressive.
Next, a duet featuring Mary Kay and Mimi. This is what I really wanted to see. Mimi is one of the most overbearing people I've ever met. A group of girls had gotten together last night to watch Glee while Mimi and Mary Kay were practicing, and apparently it was wretched.
And it was. They did the Beatles "Eight Days a Week." Both were low singers, and again, off key. Mimi was trying to concentrate, but Mary Kay kept making devil horns behind her head. She wanted us to clap, so we started clapping, then she tried to get us to do a little double clap thing, and it took the audience three choruses to get it. And then Mary Kay started doing this thing where she would lean in really close to the mic every odd line so it would be "eight days a week I LOOOOVVE you. Eight days a week IS NOT enough to show I CARE." And awkward like that. This went on the last two thirds of the song.
Mimi was kind of mean to Jenny yesterday, so I quietly enjoyed the making a fool of herself bit.
Then a few girls came up and showed off these handbags one of them made. One was actually really beautiful and, depending on price, I would totally buy.
And then an older woman got up and sang "Second Hand Rose." She wasn't great, but she was wearing black sequined hot shorts. She had great legs for her age, but I was totally shocked by this, because my Grandma would complain about age appropriate clothing. And because this woman is part of the group that complains about certain people wearing pajama bottoms at dinner, even though they cover the entire leg.
I asked, since Thanksgiving is coming up, if I could help with a particular dinner service they're doing for the homeless. They said they had too many volunteers, but thanked me. I'm sort of bummed out about it because I was planning on it.
Then we had treats. I had apple cider (the only stuff of it I've had all year) and pumpkin pie. It was a bit rich, but I sat with Jenny and Elizabeth and Clare and later Ruth came over and we had a good chat. Elizabeth wants to get Clare and Jenny to do a play with her next talent show (yes, there's another one next month...) Clare's busy that night, so I suspect it won't happen. And Ruth, who I haven't seen for ages, seems to be pretty tired these days.
I was pretty entertained, I must admit.
As I was going home, I passed by Bethany and some other girls watching Law and Order: Special Victims Unit.
"When are we going to see less of Stabler's clothes?" I asked. Some of the girls laughed.
"He just got shot, you know."
I immediately left. I can't take hearing that.
When I got back, Elena was still watching tv.
"Now that's a talent," I said. Bethany and Olivia both smiled. The talent show was tonight, and Bethany was performing.
I asked Elena if she wanted to go to the talent show we were having, and she said no, because she had to study. Then she sat down and started watching a tv show online. Okay, I thought. Elena isn't very social. She'll sit with me in the caf if I'm alone, but if I'm with anyone else, she'll sit alone.
But I went anyway, sitting down next to Lavina. We chatted a bit, and then Jenny came in to sit behind me. She was exicted for this talent show because she thinks everyone here is talentless. Considering who I knew was performing, I had to agree, but I was here mostly for the treats and the laugh.
It was worse than I thought. First, they had Portia come up and read a poem. Portia strikes me as really stupid, but I had no idea she was a writer. The announcer said she had even been published and then I thought "maybe she really is good."
But she wasn't. Poetry is so hard, I know, but her poem was about the language of love, and about the soul, and at one point the "pencil of justice" was involved. When she said this it was really funny, just because she said it like a mother scolds a child. Jenny started cracking up behind me. I was trying really hard to ignore her because if I started giggling I might not stop.
Then a solo by Mary Kay. She has a low voice, which might have been fine, but she was totally off-key the entire time. She was good enough to dance through her song though.
Then a couple of artists showed off their paintings. The announcer kept saying they were watercolor, but I'm pretty sure watercolors don't really manage black (I know because I tried during my Gothy art days). I'm almost certain they were oil paintings. Also, someone took responsibility for this creepy painting of a man that eyes follow me every time I'm in the room. So I guess now I know who to blame.
Then Bethany's dance. It was by far the best performance of the night, but I didn't think it was that good. As terrible as this is to say, I've seen such better dancing, though there were parts where she was really fluid or did something bendable and impressive.
Next, a duet featuring Mary Kay and Mimi. This is what I really wanted to see. Mimi is one of the most overbearing people I've ever met. A group of girls had gotten together last night to watch Glee while Mimi and Mary Kay were practicing, and apparently it was wretched.
And it was. They did the Beatles "Eight Days a Week." Both were low singers, and again, off key. Mimi was trying to concentrate, but Mary Kay kept making devil horns behind her head. She wanted us to clap, so we started clapping, then she tried to get us to do a little double clap thing, and it took the audience three choruses to get it. And then Mary Kay started doing this thing where she would lean in really close to the mic every odd line so it would be "eight days a week I LOOOOVVE you. Eight days a week IS NOT enough to show I CARE." And awkward like that. This went on the last two thirds of the song.
Mimi was kind of mean to Jenny yesterday, so I quietly enjoyed the making a fool of herself bit.
Then a few girls came up and showed off these handbags one of them made. One was actually really beautiful and, depending on price, I would totally buy.
And then an older woman got up and sang "Second Hand Rose." She wasn't great, but she was wearing black sequined hot shorts. She had great legs for her age, but I was totally shocked by this, because my Grandma would complain about age appropriate clothing. And because this woman is part of the group that complains about certain people wearing pajama bottoms at dinner, even though they cover the entire leg.
I asked, since Thanksgiving is coming up, if I could help with a particular dinner service they're doing for the homeless. They said they had too many volunteers, but thanked me. I'm sort of bummed out about it because I was planning on it.
Then we had treats. I had apple cider (the only stuff of it I've had all year) and pumpkin pie. It was a bit rich, but I sat with Jenny and Elizabeth and Clare and later Ruth came over and we had a good chat. Elizabeth wants to get Clare and Jenny to do a play with her next talent show (yes, there's another one next month...) Clare's busy that night, so I suspect it won't happen. And Ruth, who I haven't seen for ages, seems to be pretty tired these days.
I was pretty entertained, I must admit.
"When are we going to see less of Stabler's clothes?" I asked. Some of the girls laughed.
"He just got shot, you know."
I immediately left. I can't take hearing that.
When I got back, Elena was still watching tv.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Almost Perfect
"I don't want to look like you, because you're too perfect" could sum up my feelings about a lot of girls I was around in high school. I don't know what it is about college, but after a certain point you're too busy to notice anyone else. Or at least I was.
The only umbrage I take with this is that the young woman singing the song is the epitome of modern female beauty. If this song was being sung by someone who didn't somehow fit the mold, I might like it a little better.
So, really, if the Donnas or some angry grrrl band could cover this, I'd be much more in.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Poles
My sister and I were in a store. She wanted a new baseball cap for when she went outside. She wanted an MSU one. We were looking at some particular MSU ones, and noticed that all the smaller sizes were gone. A young man helping us in the store noted that the opposite was true for the U of M hats; all the larger sizes were gone.
"That's because people at U of M have heads pumped up with hot air," I said jokingly.
It took him a moment, but he got it. He laughed.
Later on at the same store, I was holding one of those metal sticks that one uses for getting things down from high places while my sister was trying to decide on hats. One of the other young men working in the store came up to me and asked if I liked poles.
"I like all kinds of poles," I answered.
Like most people who have never encountered me before, both of the young men standing there were both totally shocked. What kind of girl says that?
My friends are used to my wit, but sometimes it takes other people by surprise. I am used to this.
"You should be a comedian," the second boy replied. I get that a lot. I told him I was a writer, and that some of the stuff I write is funny. Most of the stuff I'm writing right now isn't, but that's because I have only had time to write when I am upset about something and am using my writing for therapy. I use to write a lot of humorous short pieces and before that screenplays with the sense of humor you might see on Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Tori is convinced I should be a comedian, and maybe one day I'll sit down and write a stand up piece and try it out on some poor, unsuspecting audience. For the time being, it is nice to be recognized as a wit and to make people smile. Making people smile and laugh is the most rewarding part, I can assure you.
"That's because people at U of M have heads pumped up with hot air," I said jokingly.
It took him a moment, but he got it. He laughed.
Later on at the same store, I was holding one of those metal sticks that one uses for getting things down from high places while my sister was trying to decide on hats. One of the other young men working in the store came up to me and asked if I liked poles.
"I like all kinds of poles," I answered.
Like most people who have never encountered me before, both of the young men standing there were both totally shocked. What kind of girl says that?
My friends are used to my wit, but sometimes it takes other people by surprise. I am used to this.
Tori is convinced I should be a comedian, and maybe one day I'll sit down and write a stand up piece and try it out on some poor, unsuspecting audience. For the time being, it is nice to be recognized as a wit and to make people smile. Making people smile and laugh is the most rewarding part, I can assure you.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Last Night's Wit
Last night, my Mom had some friends over for a craft marathon. My Mom loves making stuff like that.
I'm not a huge fan of all my Mom's friends, but a lot of them seem to think I'm hilarious.
They were discussing my Mom's boss, Cherrie, who I hate. Among other things, Cherrie likes to tell people who aren't Pentecostals that they're going to hell. Obviously, as someone who believes in religious tolerance, I have little patience for this kind of stuff.
Cherrie's what I like to call a Pharisee, one of those Christians that thinks that she somehow is better than others because of her religion. (The name is a reference to a parable of Jesus covered in Luke 18:9-14). Wrong. She just likes to use religion to justify her own behavior.
Anyway, Elizabeth (one of my Mom's friends) and my Mom were discussing Cherrie, and my Mom refrained from saying anything bad.
"You know," I said "It's okay in this household to call Cherrie a selfish bitch. It's the truth."
"You go girl!" Elizabeth said. Yeah yeah.
Later on in the evening, my Mom asked me if I had a zip drive she could borrow. "Sorry," I said.
"You lost my purple zip drive."
"I didn't lose it. I just don't know where it is."
Elizabeth thought this was hilarious.
In truth, I'm almost certain my zip drives are in a particular backpack. If not, they're buried with a bunch of my other college stuff.
I'm not a huge fan of all my Mom's friends, but a lot of them seem to think I'm hilarious.
They were discussing my Mom's boss, Cherrie, who I hate. Among other things, Cherrie likes to tell people who aren't Pentecostals that they're going to hell. Obviously, as someone who believes in religious tolerance, I have little patience for this kind of stuff.
Cherrie's what I like to call a Pharisee, one of those Christians that thinks that she somehow is better than others because of her religion. (The name is a reference to a parable of Jesus covered in Luke 18:9-14). Wrong. She just likes to use religion to justify her own behavior.
Anyway, Elizabeth (one of my Mom's friends) and my Mom were discussing Cherrie, and my Mom refrained from saying anything bad.
"You know," I said "It's okay in this household to call Cherrie a selfish bitch. It's the truth."
"You go girl!" Elizabeth said. Yeah yeah.
Later on in the evening, my Mom asked me if I had a zip drive she could borrow. "Sorry," I said.
"You lost my purple zip drive."
"I didn't lose it. I just don't know where it is."
Elizabeth thought this was hilarious.
In truth, I'm almost certain my zip drives are in a particular backpack. If not, they're buried with a bunch of my other college stuff.
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