Optometrist

Like most people, I hate going to see doctor's.  But I recently realized what I really hate about going: socializing. 
This seems like a strange thing to say, since I'm relatively social.  But those people I socialize with are friends.  I don't want to talk to my doctor's about stuff.  When they ask "How are you?" I want that to be a cue to assert my overall health, not as a chance to catch up on my family, my career and the drama with that one friend. 
With this in mind I went to see my optometrist.  I sat in the waiting room, reading one of those celebrity magazines that I only look at when there's not something more sophisticated. 
I went in with the assistant, an older woman.  We tested various small things with my eyes.  There's a test where you're suppose to tell if certain circles are jumping out at you while wearing 3-D glasses.  As the years have gone on, I have failed more and more of that test. 
Failing eye tests are nothing new.  When I was thirteen, I had to take an eye test while at school.  I failed the first time, with my glasses on.  So they called me in a second time, and I failed a second time, again, with my glasses on.  I tried to explain to the lady running the test I had really poor eyes, and I think she believed me, but I was really embarrassed by this.  I didn't fail anything at that age. 
We kept going through tests, and, even with my glasses on, it's amazing how little I can see.  I think if I had lived before glasses, I would have been confined. 
The doctor came in and I braced myself.  This doctor really likes to socialize.  It's not that I can't be polite, or that I can't speak back, but this particular doctor likes to talk about politics, and we do not share the same beliefs.  Several years ago, he complained to me about a apparently gay English professor who tried to pick him up.  I have gay friends, and I know there's almost no way this story is true.  LBGT people are scared to pick people up if they don't know their sexuality, especially if they're doing so in an "unsafe" place.  (They're more likely to pick up in a gay club or bar, but there it's expected and assumed you're okay with that.)  I didn't really tell him I disagree, but I don't really want to talk to him about politics.  I only rely on him over my eyes because my Mom insists, but the truth is I'd rather try someone else. 
We had a long discussion about surgery.  We've been considering surgery for my eyes for what seems like ever now.  At least high school, though I think it goes back farther than that.  (I was first told that I could use contacts at ten.  I never have because something about putting shards of plastic in your eye strikes me as gross.  I can't even look at someone who is putting in or taking out their contacts.  It's one of the few things I find unsightly.)
Anyway, the surgery option is always on the table, though it's unclear if I qualify.  I would need to get checked. 
Thankfully, there was none of that.  Instead, he went through the usual tests, checking my eyes with those various glasses.  When he decided on something, we moved on to making sure I didn't have things like glaucoma.
I hate those eye drops that you get.  They always make my eyes sting and they give me a headache.  I don't even try to do anything after an eye exam, because I know it's futile to try. 

Success (Sort of)

Okay, so after less than an hour of working around stuff, I have created a new layout.
There I was, cursing my self for not going to a better school with computer classes on HTML design. I was annoyed that Google, who owns Blogger, has help pages with links that don't go anywhere. You click on a link and you get a "this page doesn't exist" message. Then there is a page with the details I needed to hear but none of the helpful bits where it tells you how to get to that program. Tres annoying.
Finally, I found the Blogger Template Design, which is this big fancy program that lets me pick the layout and background and color and, most important of all, the width of the page, which is exactly what I wanted to fix so I could post YouTube videos without them looking strangely cut off. My previous layout (Son of Moto, what-what!) was not having any of it. It apparently can't be messed with in the layout designer. Which made me wonder what the heck is going on. They design a fancy program to make layout design easier for us Luddites to figure out but doesn't allow us to play with the even easy pick and choose layouts? Hmmm...
There was something about making this new layout that felt very Frankensteiny. I felt like I was creating a monster. A green monster that was giving me a headache. So long as it doesn't kill the love of my life, read Paradise Lost or run off into the wilderness as I'm dying on a ship, I guess I'm good.
Which segways into my next thought: does this layout give anyone a headache? It's giving me a headache, but that could be the stress and irritation that comes with technology.