Trade Off

Once, I was hanging out at Katie's room, and we heard a noise outside.  We poked out heads out of her place, and down the hall (which was only a few doors down,) we saw Rita and a few others looking out the door.  We went over, and there was a guy, pounding on the door, howling in this really low voice.  He was extremely belligerent and almost certainly drunk.  It made me think of werewolves.  He wanted someone to let him in, and Rita told him no.  At which point, he beat in part of the door, making a big enough hole for him to just open the door himself. 
At which point, we scattered into various rooms, and then locked the doors. 
I bring up this story because I was wandering down the hall late one night, wet from a shower, and I heard a similar noise, and I found myself wondering if someone was, once again, trying to break into a building. 
Oh God, how I had wished someone was trying to break in. 
Because of the potential danger the last time, I was edging down the hallway very slowly, ready to turn and run if danger should arrive.  About halfway down the hallway I realized the sounds, which was low, was coming from inside the building.  Inside?  What the heck? 
And then, right before I came around the corner, I heard a woman's voice and it hit me.  A couple is having sex.  Loudly.  And from what it sound like, potentially very painful sex.  Seriously, the guy's voice was really loud, and made me think of a monster, and like I said, I mistook it for a drunk. 
This was the part that ended up really surprising me (yes, there was a part that surprised me even more): standing in front of the offending door was a young man I knew.  He immediately signaled me to keep quietly frantically, and I think I whispered "Do you seriously think I want to draw attention to myself at a time like this?"  Oh hell no. 
It wouldn't have mattered if I had just walked over there, because the door I needed to go in was just across the hall anyway, so I would have to hear stuff anyway, and I would have seen people anyway.  I went into the room, locking the door behind me, wondering what the heck was going on and why God felt the need to punish me. 
I laid down in the bed, but I could still hear them. 
I went to the peephole, and saw the young man standing outside go inside after the noises inside stopped.  He didn't wait long, and he basically knocked on the door as he was opening it.  That indicated this was something they were all use to. 
I went back to bed but had trouble sleeping. 
I've been finding myself really lonely lately.  And then I feel guilty for feeling lonely, because I have tons of friends (how many people have I mentioned on this blog alone?  I don't even know.)  But I think all the changes in my circumstances has me wishing for something more stable. 
When I was younger, I never spent time with people outside the places I was forced to socialize (school, but also after school activities and other things like that.)  There were lots of people I liked and I had a lot of respect for certain individuals, but I didn't really want to spend more time with time.  What I wanted to do was read books and write stories and go out for walks.  I was alone, but after a certain point, I stopped getting lonely.  And then I spent years not being lonely. 
Sometimes I wonder if becoming a social person again was worth it, because I was emotionally tough in ways that sometimes I don't feel now.  And like I said, I never got lonely.  Even after I got social again, in those first few years I only got lonely once every six months at most.  I'm not sure if this was such a smart trade off. 

Noise

I might be one of those people who is sensative to noise.  Whoever lives next to me banged very loudly through the wall around 11:30 at night.  This struck me as rich, because the woman who lives there is very loud herself, screaming into the night.  I think she's talking on the phone, but this goes on for hours sometimes.  I think she could stay music, especially since it's better than what she makes. 
This morning, my roommate's alarm went off really early and loudly, and it woke me up.  And then my roommate didn't even get up, which annoyed me.  She is really noisy in the morning when she is getting ready, and it has sort of gotten on my nerves.  And then she comes home at night, and makes tons of noise before getting into bed, so now I am tired all the time.  I'm misspelling things everytime I sit down to write, and I find misspellings so embarrassing. 
If that wasn't enough, this morning my neighbor was up again around eight, screaming into her phone again.  Good Lord, she sounds abusive.  Not that I can tell what she is saying. 

Power Down

The power went out earlier today.  Luckily, it was still mostly light outside.  I had a long list of things I wanted to do, but most of them involved a computer, so I sat down and began doing some reading.  I read two essays, finished the introduction for the book, and then went over a third essay's notes.  (I read that last essay a few months back, so I really don't think it's necessary to re-read it.)  I have a whole list of things now that I want to look up or think about or write about now.  Some of them are actually very exciting.  But I'll save that for later.
Without power, I had to sit in the rooms with large windows and work by them.  My father felt the need to sit in the first room I choose, reading a book, probably a biography.  (All old people, it seems, like biographies.  Which would be fine if they had better taste in people to be interested in.)  Then he would make all sorts of noise that I found very distracting.  So I moved to the kitchen, also with a large enough window I could sit and work by.
But of course that meant my father had to come in and make tons of noise there to.  I moved back to the first room.  He came into the first room, so I'm back in the kitchen.  Then he's back in the kitchen, trying to fix something.
This is one of the many things that irritates my about him.  He's so rude.  You'll clearly be doing something, like talking on the phone, and he always, no matter what, manages to want to distract you, by talking to you.
Finally, I got all the reading I wanted done.  I went upstairs.  I considered calling Dan.  He would probably have a lot to say about us being without power and maybe I could make amends for the insensitive things I said the last time I spoke to him.
Then I looked outside.  We had lost power, presumably, because it was raining.  But the raining stopped about twenty minutes after the power went out.  So I decide to go out.
I always try not to leave a lot of time to talk to my dad.  I quickly say that I am going out for a walk, and then he feels the need to tell me where I should walk.
This is another thing that makes me crazy.  He is always telling me what to do like I'm four.  I'm twenty-two, I'm fine, thanks, go away now.  I can't do anything in his line of sight without him telling me how to do it.  I wish I could say that I'm the only one who does this, but I've heard his officemates complain of the same thing.
People do not like being told what to do.  Generally, it's a bad idea.  If someone asks for advice or your thoughts on the matter, than by all means, be honest, but otherwise, no, no one cares.
His current job is ending soon, which means he will once again have nothing to do but hang around the house and hover over every little thing I do.  God, living here makes me wish I was back at MSU living alone in my room.  It was so pleasant.  I got to be around whoever, and then when I needed time alone, I went to be alone.
When I came back from my walk, the power was thankfully on, and I was able to work on my various projects in relative peace.
But then when I went downstairs to get some crackers, he felt the need to tell me where I could eat them.